This is what happens when your name is Asshole and you come home after work and start doing your daily drinking, hit the shit-faced point by 7:00 and bug the holy fuck out of your wonderful, doesn't-deserve-your-shit, live-in girlfriend for 2 hours and get her so upset that she cries for 30 minutes and almost packs a bag to go to her mom's house and then you ask her to drive your drunk ass to a restaurant where you expect her to pay for her own meal and sit across from you while you slop food all over the place and chew with your mouth open and talk loudly about inappropriate subjects so that the kids in the next booth can hear you and you fight all the way home about why you never get any sex anymore and then you pass out on the couch with your mouth hanging open just like every other night this week. You scum-sucking ass-face. Your soon-to-be-X-girlfriend just might break out a picture of you when you were passed out that has shit painted on it to make you look like you're in drag and post it for everyone to see so they can laugh at your dumb, passed out all the damn time, not-getting-sex-from-me-ever-again, suckyourowndickfuckoffanddie, loser ass.
I was in NO MOOD for this shit tonight. I have reached my limit. Every fucking night it's something like this and I have to keep my hurt and rage bottled up and it sucks the life out of me and is turning me into the bitch from hell. I've had it. I'm upset about leaving his kids but he is NOT going to take me down with him. I can't do this anymore. I can't breathe. It's me or him and I choose me.
Edit: I'm OK now. I got it all out of my system. I'm extra cranky today because I'm in pain. I fell asleep in the sun yesterday with a tank top on and realized 3 hours later that I had put sunblock everywhere but my chest. I've got some major tanning to do after the burn is gone to get rid of that line.
Feel bad for me, will ya? It's ugly and it hurts.
8 Comments:
At 4:35 AM,
Dark Damian said…
Sorry about AH. Sounds like AH needs AA, ASAP, or you'll be AWOL.
But that second picture? Racktacular.
At 10:53 AM,
Boobless Brigade Master said…
1) Sorry about the sunburn...been there, done that...OW!
Get ya some L'Oreal Sublime tanner for the in between laying out times, it works really well!
2) Now that you're in a some-what better mood, here's some ideas to make it a little more interesting for you next time:
http://www.allfunpix.com/picspages2/passed_out.html
http://www.funny-games.biz/pictures/drunk-pictures.html
http://blogging.typepad.com/funny_pictures/drunk_pictures/index.html
Yes. I know. I'm evil. ::grin::
At 6:56 AM,
mikster said…
All I can say about that picture is "Boy, you sure do have a pretty mouth." I'm not sure why the movie Deliverance popped into my head though....lol
At 10:18 PM,
Sherri said…
DD - I know, I know. Oh, and thanks, Baby. You always have the best compliments
BBM - Thanks for the sympathy....and the ideas:)
Mike - Mikey, honey, you're freakin' me out a little.
Doc T - It's feeling better now that it's been a few days but I SWEAR it was bright red and hurt like hell. And stay tuned, hopefully I'll be bloggin soon about moving to a new place.
At 2:30 PM,
Anonymous said…
I mean, the eye shadow is a good color and all, but he really puts on way too much. He needs a makeover.
At 9:13 PM,
CP said…
That picture of the AH is hysterical and he is soooooo deserving of it.
Can we do DD next? *L*
CP.
At 10:32 PM,
Sherri said…
Macca - He does NOTHING right. Even after you give him instructions. Eye shadow would be no different.
Bigdawg - Haven't you seen them already and, HEY!!! My eyes are up HERE.
CP - Yeah, let's DO DD next...I mean ummm...you get the padded bra, fake eyelashes and stilettos and I'll bring the Tina Turner wig, the Coral colored lip gloss and the Tequila. On your mark, get set, go!
At 8:33 PM,
Dark Damian said…
Bring it. I'll take you BOTH on. I'll die in a sea of breasts a happy, happy man.
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